Of Armored Feet and Jealousy
by Runaway Wordette
Summary: Perhaps in Serra's eyes in was chivalrous. To the rest of the army it was hilarious. To Erk it was damn embarrassing.


**I just had to. The idea just came to me and turned into... Well, this. I find Serra an intriguing character and I wish that a few more of the stories would show her badass strong side rather than the annoying princess of shrieking side. But I really can't talk because I portray Serra as a rather annoying character in this story. Hmmm... Perhaps a little farther down the road I'll attempt a serious Serra-centric story, but till then, enjoy this senseless bit of humor. **

**Review if you like, it would make me very happy.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Fire Emblem or any of its characters.**

* * *

Erk is angry.

Now many might say this was a common occurrence, for the mage had a tendency to walk around with a rather severe expression on his face. (One might say it looked like Raven's, minus the evil, anger, resentment, hate, and a few more of the other lovely emotions Raven is known for.) But anyone who knew Erk, knew he wasn't angry. No, he is that special mix of irritation, frustration, exasperation, and thoughtfulness unique to him alone.

So, no. Erk is never angry. Anger is a powerful emotion reserved for immature people, he had decided. He was above anger, mentally beyond the state of mind which clouded the senses. Or so he thought.

He was currently in a state of extreme anger and he could feel the emotion pumping through his veins. He could feel how his fists were tightly clenched and he could feel how his posture had immediately shot up when he experienced the rush of the feeling. It all came from a certain pink haired, impish cleric.

People also tend to think that Serra makes Erk angry. It is a common misconception, due to the not-so-loving glares he often bestows upon her small personage. She likes to squeal in his ear, demand he give her his undivided attention, interrupt his studies, and complain to him about various things that aren't really complaint worthy. But this doesn't make Erk angry. No, it annoys him, but at the same time it gives him a unique emotion no one else manages to bring forth from him. Amusement.

Yes, to a varying degree, Erk enjoys Serra's… erm- _unique _presence. Though he wouldn't admit it for all the Excalibur tomes in the world.

Now knowing that Serra does not make Erk angry and that Erk never experiences the emotion regardless, why now does she elicit such a response from him? And more importantly, how did she manage to do it unknowingly?

One word. Sain.

Ah yes, Sain. The camp womanizer with eloquent speech skills. It's safe to say that Sain will probably remain a bachelor for the rest of his years, despite the lavish attention he fruitlessly wastes on all women. But that doesn't stop him from trying, and so far, the only female who hasn't screamed, maimed, or ran away from him when he made use of his flirting skill was in fact, Serra. He takes this as a miracle and heaps even more abundant praise upon the giggling cleric. There's nothing wrong with being complimented, is there not?

Now back to our stewing mage. Erk was watching Sain kiss Serra's hand and say something that made her burst into peals of laughter. Erk is no longer angry. No, now, he is _livid._

"Erk?"

Erk turned to the source of the voice to see Kent standing next to him. A questioning look was on his face as he looked between the flirting couple and the glaring mage.

"I was just wondering if you were perchance going to Elffire Sain into oblivion."

Erk looked back at the couple- Sain was now serenading Serra while she giggled- and his hand twitched towards the tome hidden in the folds of his robe.

"No, Sir Kent," he finally managed to grit out.

He heard a sigh and he turned to look at said knight in surprise.

"Being jealous accomplishes nothing."

Erk opened his mouth to object vehemently that Sain could have the pink haired she demon for all he cared but Kent interrupted.

"Trust me, when Sain was flirting with Fiora the other day, he found himself flat on his back with a bloody nose."

Erk began to gape and finally said, "You punched him?!"

A slight smile lit Kent's face and he shook his head. "It would be entirely improper to strike down a companion. I merely directed his face away from Dame Fiora with my fist before he went too far."

With that the orange haired knight turned and walked away to go order about some soldiers or do whatever orange haired knights do. Erk turned back to the blissfully unaware couple and sucked in a deep breath.

He was not jealous. Merely concerned for Serra's safety. No, no, NOTHING could ever manage to harm Serra. He was… Worried she was becoming distracted from her duty. Yes, Yes. Now that his excuse for what he was about to do was planned, he could commence with his plan of action.

He drew himself up to his full height, which still was a few inches shorter than Sain, and marched over to the scene. Too bad, no one ever told Erk he looks incredibly stupid when he marches.

He stood behind the knight and caught a few words of their conversation.

"O beauteous Serra! Your beauty shines brighter through your fair lavender eyes of mist than the crystal on your staff!"

"HE HEM!"

Both Serra and Sain turned to face the mage to see if someone was dying or choking on something, rather to find a very dangerous looking glare.

"Erky, are you angry?"

Silence.

"Fellow comrade! How fare you this fine-"

BAM

CLANG

THUD

"Erky!"

Then there was nothing.

When Erk opened his eyes, he was in a white linen tent. He looked around him and winced at the sudden dull throb that came from his forehead.

"You're a complete idiot, you know."

He turned to the source of the amused voice to find bright lavender eyes staring at him with a sparkle of laughter in them that must have something to do with his current situation. Erk really did wish he knew why he was in medical tent and why his head felt like it was going to explode, and he might just lose his temper unless someone told him soon.

"It was very chivalrous, I'll give you that much. Sain was starting to get on my nerves."

Hah. That's right, she likes me more than the bastar-

"But he really is quite poetic."

Damn.

Serra let out a dramatic sigh and put a finger to her chin as if in deep thought.

"But it would have been even more chivalrous if you hadn't… Well, you are a mage and he is a knight, I don't know how you expected to be able to-"

"What did I do?"

Erk was now becoming slightly anxious as his last few moments of consciousness were nothing more than a foggy memory to him. All he could remember was feeling very angry when he walked up to Sain and Serra…

"You don't remember?!" squealed an indignant Serra.

"No."

Serra jumped up in anger, giving him a VERY nasty look.

"The one thing you do for me that might ever possibly be even considered romantic and you don't REMEMBER?!"

Now Erk was veery worried. What. Had. He. Done.

He opened his mouth to say something, no doubt something sarcastic and rude, but she gave him no chance, storming out of the tent.

Erk sighed and gingerly put a hand to his forehead, realizing it was very scratched up. How had I managed to do that?

A _swip _noise came from the tent flap and Erk looked to see Kent enter with a rather amused expression on his face.

"I'm quite sorry, Erk, I didn't know you'd take my advice that way. This is entirely my fault."

"WHAT DID I DO?!"

The knight raised his eyebrows at the desperate look on the young mage's face and sat down beside his cot.

"You mean you don't remember?"

"No." came the flat reply.

Kent sighed and shook his head. "Well… Er… I suppose I'll have to tell you…"

Erk watched attentively as the knight began.

"Well… After I implied that you should do something about Sain flirting with Serra… You did a slightly strange walk over to them which might be classified as a march and made a very loud and repulsive noise in the back of your throat to get their attention. They turned and when they did… Well…"

Erk's sense of dread was growing as the story progressed. He had remembered this far but everything after was a black out.

"You… Well when Sain turned around… You _tried_ to punch him…"

… Wait, what?

"I tried to punch him?"

"Well… yes…"

"Then why isn't he in the medical tent? Did you say _tried_ to punch him?"

"You missed entirely, which really was quite extraordinary because he was two feet from you, then you lost your balance rather spectacularly and face planted straight into his armored foot."

"…"

"…"

"WHAT?!"

"Yes… It's all my fault you see, because I thought you were going to send some kind of fire ball at him to scare him off. I really didn't expect to see you attempt to engage him in physical combat."

Erk closed his eyes and began to bang his head against the back of his pillow (which really is more painful than it sounds when you have recently slammed your face into an armored foot) while Kent watched uncomfortably.

"How many people were watching?"

"Well… Most of the army…"

Erk let out a loud groan and grabbed the pillow from underneath his head, covering his face with it.

"On the bright side, Lady Serra seemed very happy about the whole thing."

"What?"

"She was extremely pleased. She started jumping up and down letting out squeals of "oh erky" at a very high pitch."

Suddenly a high pitched voice sounded from outside the tent.

"OHHH ERRRKYYYY! I'VE DECIDED TO FORGIVE YOU!"

Damn.


End file.
